Prayer

I just had a big prayer session. I came to a realisation that there are so many things running around my head at the moment that I can't make sense of and feel no hope about. And yet, I had hardly prayed about any of them. In fact, my prayer life has been pretty sucky for a while now, and I think it reflected the way I had been feeling about God. Thinking, why isn't my life going anywhere? Why do I find no satisfaction with work? Why am I finding friendships and relationships so difficult and people so frustrating?
Then I realised, I hadn't prayed about any of these things. I just left them to stew in my mind with no input from God. I wasn't entrusting those things to God. I was entrusting them to myself.

So I had a big prayer time. And it was SO GOOD. Prayer is one of those things (for me anyway) that you know you're supposed to do it, but never put as a priority. For me, when I turned the light out at night, I'd suddenly remember, 'Oh yeh, I should pray.' But rarely do I ever just sit down and spend a large chunk of time just giving everything over to God.

There is something to be said about coming to the Creator of the Universe and saying, 'I am broken and I know it. I'm sorry, please help me' and knowing that this Great King is going to listen to you, not because of anything you've done or achieved or thought, but because His grace has secured a relationship with Him. Prayer is about humility, it's saying I can't run my life, God, I need you to intervene. And so prayer is something that I need to do in every area of my life. Even the stupidest smallest things. And definitely the bigger things.

So now I am feeling a lot better with the relationships in my life. I don't feel so down about where my life is at the moment. I'm not putting so much pressure on work to fulfil me. Because God is the only one who can do that, and making something GOOD that God has made and making it an idol will never fulfil me. Relationships, a family of my own, a job I'm passionate about - all good things but never things that will fulfil my ultimate need of forgiveness in Christ. Praise God for his goodness.

When was the last time you prayed?

Stewardship and The City - Part 1

I have a bit of a penchant for trashy reality television - not Jerry Springer or even Oprah, but stuff like Keeping up with the Kardashians, The Hills and most recently, The City, a spin-off of the Hills with a focus on the character (real-life person?) Whitney.

Whitney is a twenty-something girl looking to forward her career in fashion in New York, whilst enjoying the lifestyle that a cashed up kid from LA is used to. Every shot of the program reveals the cosmopolitan nature of the city, the aesthetic brilliance of each outfit worn, and the drama of Whitney's life. I won't deny that I sometimes, whilst watching the show, have been drawn into the bright lights and independent, exciting lifestyle that only those with abundant money can afford.

I realised two things after isolating this thought. The first was, hang on, in the entire scheme of the world, in its true perspective, I DO live that lifestyle. I am in the lucky portion of the world that has four walls to shelter me. I have completed secondary studies, and am undertaking tertiary education. I have a disposable income at the point of my life which, in percentage terms, I probably won't have after I finish uni. I have parents that love me and support me, both financially and spiritually. I am in NO WAY in need, I own an iPod, a laptop, jewellery, musical instruments, shoes, hair straighteners, books, cds, abundant food, pay tv. I have clean running water. I live in a house with the same number of bedrooms as people living in it. There are SO many people in the world that do not even have sufficient food to live on. I heard a figure once that if you have four walls around you for a house, you are in the top ten percent of the rich people in the world. Let's face it, I am rich on the world's scale. I live a rich person's lifestyle. I'll explain myself further in Stewardship and the City Part II.

The second thing I realised was that a lifestyle of glamour, independence and money, whilst gratifying the needs of NOW, will never fully satiate my desire to live a meaningful life. In fact, nothing apart from having Jesus Christ as my Lord will ever satisfy me because I WAS MADE FOR RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. Every human on this planet was. And we all find a cheaper alternative to weakly satisfy this desire we have to find meaning - family, friends, sex, work, drugs, music, relationships. But the problem is, that these things can never satisfy. They are weak gods that never fully satisfy. They were never meant to.

Jesus said, 'Seek first the Kingdom of God, and everything else will be added to you.' God knows what we need. We need relationship with him. We need Jesus' sacrifice. We need His way of living. We can do nothing without Him.

My prayer for myself and for you is that we would never give in to the lie that we can find meaning apart from having a grace-secured relationship with our Maker and Creator. It is only then that we realise just how richly blessed we are.

Do you have this relationship with God?

I love this guy

Let me challenge you.

Proverbs 28:23
Whoever rebukes a person will in the end gain favor rather than one who has a flattering tongue.

There are two main identities that people tend to assign to ministers' kids:
1. The Rebel - this is the kid who hates to be associated with being the 'normal, good Christian kid' and will hate all the pressure and expectations that are often put on ministers' kids.
2. The goody-two-shoes: this is the kid that others see as a the one that always does the right thing, is super-Christian, and often people assume 'they're just doing that coz their dad's the minister'.

To be honest, I've never been the rebel - it always seem kinda stupid to me, and I never wanted to be put into that box. My parents never forced me to do anything Christian, and they always said I could leave the church they were at and go to another one if I didn't feel comfortable being 'the Minister's kid'. But I hate being associated the goody-two-shoes as well, because to me being labelled as that is to look past that I have pure motives in living the Christian life and I want to and strive to live a godly life because I think it is glorifying to God - not because I think that's how I'm meant to act as the minister's kid.

I do think we need to get past these stereotypes and to treat minister's kids as normal people - and the purpose of this post is to bring up this: in my Christian life, people rarely rebuke me. I know that as a whole, we tend to be pretty bad at this as individuals, I know I am. I hate conflict and the thought of telling someone that they are sinning and need to stop is pretty scary. But I think that people ESPECIALLY think that Ministers' kids don't need rebuking for some reason. You think that just because we live in a house next to the church we don't sin? It's true, people, I'm a sinner! I am a sinner who needs rebuking at times and I hope that people don't think that just because I'm a minister's kid that I don't need strong encouragement from God's word. It would let me know that people love me with the love that God loves me with if I was rebuked every so often!

I don't think I'll like it very much, but let me challenge you: if you know me well, and you know I need rebuking, please do it! I promise I won't bite your head off...and I know in the long run I will be better off and you'll help me to become more like Jesus.

Proverbs 3: 11-12
11 My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline,
and do not resent his rebuke,
12 because the LORD disciplines those he loves,
as a father the son he delights in.

Proverbs 9:8
Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you; rebuke the wise and they will love you.

Proverbs 13:1
A wise son heeds his father’s instruction, but a mocker does not respond to rebukes.

Proverbs 17:10
A rebuke impresses a discerning person more than a hundred lashes a fool

Proverbs 19:25
Flog a mocker, and the simple will learn prudence; rebuke the discerning, and they will gain knowledge.

Proverbs 25:12
Like an earring of gold or an ornament of fine gold is the rebuke of a wise judge to a listening ear.

Proverbs 27:5
Better is open rebuke than hidden love.

Proverbs 29:1
Whoever remains stiff-necked after many rebukes will suddenly be destroyed—without remedy.

Forty three

I know in my head that we find purpose in being in relationship with God. This is THE purpose of life, right? Yes, I agree.

Then how come I feel so listless? That my life doesn't really have any set direction? I feel like I am cruising along in life.....yes, taking opportunities as they come, but not having an overall purpose.

Does anyone else feel this way? Sometimes I feel guilty because I know that as a Christian I DO have purpose, but I often don't feel fulfilled. We have the job of spreading the gospel, that is a great job to have. I'd love to have other goals as well, personal ones.

I feel like 'I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For'....but I'm not quite sure what I'm looking for. I'm hoping it's a phase that will pass because it is really just a feeling - I know I have purpose in Jesus Christ and building relationship with God and other people. I just don't feel it at the moment.

All I need is a red guitar, three chords and the truth: U2 and Post rock

This is why I think U2 would be good at post rock:

1. The Edge was a pioneer at using effects and stuff in the 80s, he's got the talent and the vision to push the boundaries and try something new.
2. If you listen to the Joshua Tree stuff, you've got everything you need for a successful post rock song - the repeated guitar riffs, the angst (albeit in a different vein) and the all-important dynamic/textural build that leads to the climax of the song.
3. The bass/drums really lock in together and work together for the coherent whole of the band.
4. They are the masters of melody, so so so so needed in post rock.

They'd have to kick Bono out, of course, or maybe he could just play another instrument other than sing...no biggie really, seeing as though there isn't much singing in post-rock....I wonder how much of the awesomeness of U2 comes from the band as opposed to Bono...don't get me wrong, I love Bono's voice. But the other instruments contribute to the unique U2 sound just as much as he does. In particular, the Edge.

What do you reckon? I think if you listen to Joshua Tree and Rattle and Hum you'd agree....it'd be so easy to arrange their songs for post-rock audiences, coz they've got so many of the elements already there.
I <3 U2!

They say two are better than one...

I wish couples would be a bit more considerate.

As a single person I am constantly barraged by things in the media that tell me I need to be in a romantic relationship. My own desires tell me that I need to be in a relationship. And when I am around couples, that desire grows.

I was at Engage earlier this year, sitting in the congregation and trying to listen to what the awesome speakers were saying. In front of me was a couple, arms around each other, cuddling up to each other and, if I remember correctly, holding hands. I was left to sit behind them, unable to focus on the talk, as there was no way to just 'look away and try to forget it'. They were right in front of me, and there was nothing I could do about it. For me, it was a huge distraction that was barring me from real learning.

I just wish sometimes that couples would see past their own happiness and 'loved-up'-ness to see what their actions are doing to other people. I am trying so hard to practice contentment in my situation and to use my time effectively in this season of singleness. When I see display pics of couples looking into each others' eyes, kissing, or holding onto each other, there's something inside of me that goes, 'Hang on, why don't I have that? I want that! Why can't I have that?' It messes with my mind that is so desperately trying to convince itself that my worth does not come from having a romantic partner. It affects my self-esteem, I start feeling bad about myself, negative self-talk ensues until I forget about it and consciously try to perk up (prayer helps too).

I am not saying that people shouldn't be happy. I know that romantic relationships can bring much joy, and I am genuinely happy for people who have found someone that they like to spend time with, and that person also likes to spend time with you, too. Please just consider that your single peers are struggling sometimes and that your actions can magnify that struggle for them. There is a time for everything, please don't be so loved-up when you're at church, or in a group. Church is a place where we are all one in Christ Jesus, so let's look out for each other.

Philippians 2:1-4 ¹If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ²then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. ³Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. ⁴Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.